Not the Advertisement Jeff Bezos Wanted

June 2nd, 2014

A shady shout-out to Amazon.com in Chief Justice Roberts’s Bond opinion:

Petitioner Carol Anne Bond is a microbiologist from Lansdale, Pennsylvania. In 2006, Bond’s closest friend, Myrlinda Haynes, announced that she was pregnant. When Bond discovered that her husband was the child’s father, she sought revenge against Haynes. Bond stole a quantity of 10-chloro-10H-phenoxarsine (an arsenic-based compound) from her employer, a chemical manufacturer. She also ordered a vial of potassium dichromate (a chemi- cal commonly used in printing photographs or cleaning laboratory equipment) on Amazon.com. Both chemicals are toxic to humans and, in high enough doses, potentially lethal. It is undisputed, however, that Bond did not in- tend to kill Haynes. She instead hoped that Haynes would touch the chemicals and develop an uncomfortable rash.

And when Amazon Drone kicks in, you can have arsenic delivered directly to your neighbor!