Staten Island Borough President James Molinaro seeks to sell the naming rights to the newly-renovated Goethals Bridge, which connects Staten Island and Elizabeth, New Jersey.

I have a proposal. Name the Goethals Bridge after Staten Island’s proudest son (he grew up in West New Brighton), a person who has brought more fame and notoriety to Richmond County than any other, the man, the myth, the legend: Behold, the Situation Bridge.

Think about all the fun word play. When there’s traffic on the bridge, you can simply say, “There’s a Situation on the Situation.” When you’re getting on the bridge, you can say “I’m getting situated.” When you’re crossing the bridge, you can say “I’m getting it in.” The possibilities are endless. You could even open up Gym, Tanning, and Laundry facilities at the foot of the bridge. It’s genius.

Sitch, this is all you.

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